Matthew 18:21-35
Then Peter came and
said to him, ‘Lord, if another member of the church sins against me,
how often should I forgive? As many as seven times?’ Jesus said to
him, ‘Not seven times, but, I tell you, seventy-seven times. ‘For
this reason the kingdom of heaven may be compared to a king who wished
to settle accounts with his slaves. When he began the reckoning, one who
owed him ten thousand talents was brought to him; and, as he could not
pay, his lord ordered him to be sold, together with his wife and
children and all his possessions, and payment to be made. So the slave
fell on his knees before him, saying, “Have patience with me, and I
will pay you everything.” And out of pity for him, the lord of that
slave released him and forgave him the debt. But that same slave, as he
went out, came upon one of his fellow slaves who owed him a hundred
denarii; and seizing him by the throat, he said, “Pay what you owe.”
Then his fellow slave fell down and pleaded with him, “Have patience
with me, and I will pay you.” But he refused; then he went and threw
him into prison until he would pay the debt. When his fellow slaves saw
what had happened, they were greatly distressed, and they went and
reported to their lord all that had taken place. Then his lord summoned
him and said to him, “You wicked slave! I forgave you all that debt
because you pleaded with me. Should you not have had mercy on your
fellow slave, as I had mercy on you?” And in anger his lord handed him
over to be tortured until he would pay his entire debt. So my heavenly
Father will also do to every one of you, if you do not forgive your
brother or sister from your heart.’
SERMON
THE
BURDEN OF BEING FORGIVEN
I know
this is a story that Jesus told to make a point.
I know that it’s not important that we figure out every last
little detail of this story, but there is one feature of the story that
has continued to bother me through the years, as I’ve read it; one
thing about this story that I can’t quite make sense out of; that is
how obvious it should have been to the servant who was forgiven that he
should forgive the other servant. After
all, that first servant had received an unimaginable forgiveness the
amount of money that the scripture is speaking about would be the
equivalent to multiple millions of dollars in our world today; to be
forgiven a debt of ten million dollars.
That’s what that first servant received, that level of
forgiveness. And then,
the other debt would be more like one thousand dollars, a much, much
smaller debt.
It should have been obvious to the servant who was forgiven ten
million dollars that he ought to be at least tolerant of a debt of one
thousand dollars; instead of using the full extent of his legal powers
to punish the person who owed him. It
was obvious to the other servants who went and complained to the master.
So why wasn’t it obvious to that servant who was forgiven so
much?
Of course, we are free to figure that out for ourselves.
Again, this is a story that Jesus told to make a point.
We’re not talking about an actual individual here; we’re
talking about a character in a parable.
But, let’s think about why, in a real life situation, a person
like that who had been forgiven ten million dollars, might not turn
around and forgive a comparatively small debt.
Maybe you have to go into the mentality of this person as he left
the great master’s house after being forgiven.
His first feeling would have been one of relief because the great
master had been about to sell him into slavery with his family and all
his possessions. Or to
sell him, since he was a servant he was already in slavery, so sell him
down the river, I guess; to sell him into a more undesirable household
situation with all his family and possessions.
He was going to lose everything he had.
He was going to enter into a life of misery; until he pleaded for
forgiveness. He pleaded
actually for just a little more time to pay the debt; but the master, at
that point, gave him the unexpected gift of forgiveness.
So his first feeling, obviously, would have been one of immense
relief. He would have left
that building still shaking at what almost happened, but didn’t
happen.
But what would his next feeling be?
This new translation of the New Testament uses the word
“slave” instead of the word “servant”.
And to me that creates a misleading image in our minds, we have a
picture of American slavery and plantation field hands and the
restrictions that were placed on their lives.
But a slave in the ancient Middle East was usually a person who
was free to go and choose the way he would earn money, and then he was
indebted permanently to a master and that was what the conditions of his
slavery consisted of. So
this slave would consider himself an upstanding citizen, a person who
had aspirations to move into the middle class; so maybe one day he may
be able to purchase his freedom; which would be the last step of middle
class recognition.
That means that he already had a considerable amount of pride or
self respect. And
having been forgiven a debt of ten million dollars when you couldn’t
pay, when you were begging and pleading for a little more time to pay;
having been forgiven is all well and good, but it certainly is a blow to
your pride at the same time. It certainly would lead you to feel some
sense of shame, to feel that you’ve lost face in the eyes of your
neighbors; to feel that somehow you were not appearing in the best
light. Perhaps this servant had that kind of self image; he wanted to be
able to hold his head high among his fellow servants. He wanted them to
regard him as an independent and controlling and put-together kind of
person.
And so the idea that he had to be forgiven because he made such a
mess out of his finances would have been an intolerable idea to him.
He was dealing with the burden of being forgiven and that’s why
he turned on his fellow servant who owed him a small amount of money.
Perhaps he was thinking, “If I could just get Joe to pay that
amount of money to me, then I could make a down payment to the master;
and I could no longer be in the status of a person forgiven a ridiculous
debt, I could be in the status of a person who has debts like everybody
else, but is paying them off, bit by bit.”
That way he could earn his way back into the status of someone
who was on sound financial footing; someone who’s financial standing
was not shameful, but ordinary. He
could hold his head high among his neighbors again, if he could just
make a down payment. And
to make a down payment, he had to collect from other servants.
Maybe that’s what was happening, it’s a possibility. It’s
silly and it’s human and it’s something that I find among a lot of
human beings, myself included.
What I’m talking about is again, the burden of being forgiven,
the intolerable burden of being forgiven.
It’s related to another issue, perhaps a larger issue, which is
cherishing the way in which other people see us.
In general in our relations with other people we want to be
admired, respected, looked up to. We
want other people to think that our lives are well put-together.
We want people to think that we are people who have intelligence
and common sense and wisdom; and we have done a good job managing our
lives. We like for people to
look at us that way. We
might even have greater desires: we want people to think that we’re
amazing; we want people to think we’re fantastic; we want people to
think that there’s no body else as special as we are.
Here’s where I’m getting personal.
Reading student evaluations of their teacher’s performance is
an experience of finding out what other people really think of you.
Not that people are mean on those evaluations; if you haven’t
been an unfair or unreasonably harsh teacher, you generally will get
positive comments from your students.
But what they’re positive about doesn’t fit with my own
ego’s expectations as I go into this evaluation situation.
The forms get mailed to me and I shuffle through them and read
them. And what I’m looking
for are statements like, “He’s an amazing teacher”, “He makes
history come alive for me”, and “I’ve never had a teacher who
seems as smart and as brilliant as this man does”.
But what instead I get is “He’s really nice”, “He seems
to care about the students”, and then this one, “It’s easy to pass
his course.”
These evaluations do signal something that I’m actually trying
to do, I’m trying to not be adversarial with the students.
I want them to feel that they don’t have to be threatened by
the professor. The professor
isn’t always going to be holding an axe over their heads.
And so in a sense it is easy to pass my course, it’s not
necessarily easy to make an “A”, but it’s easy to pass.
Nevertheless, that doesn’t fit my image of brilliance that a
part of me, at least, would like to have.
Those student evaluations speak to how others actually experience
me. And that’s different
from what my ego wants to build as I consider my life.
And this same tendency, I think, is present in many of us, maybe
all of us, and it fits all kinds of different relationships we’re in.
Relationships of business, employment, friendships with others,
even our most intimate family relationships; all of these things are
defined by things about us that somebody else loves that might not be
what we choose to be loved for. We
want to be loved for our admirable qualities; sometimes we get loved for
our homeliest, silliest, most winning qualities that we are even a
little bit ashamed of ourselves. And
it’s understandable that it would be that way because that’s the
truth about who we are; that’s the truth of our lives.
This self image problem that I’m talking about, as I encounter
it in my own heart, is a problem of wishing that my life were better
than it is, and thinking that perhaps if I make some changes, I can
achieve better-ness, I can make my life more the way God wants it to be
by working hard at it. Yesterday
afternoon I cut a holly bush out of our backyard.
It had been neglected for probably 20 years and had grown these
long spindly arms all over the place and they had gotten matted down
with dead leaves. And so there’s a corner of our backyard that just
looks horrible; and I don’t think the last two owners have dealt with
it and this was my first chance to deal with it after living in the
house for a year. So I
understand it’s a very daunting task to face that holly bush.
And I spent part of the afternoon yesterday clearing it out and
hauling it out to the curb because it’s going to be curbside pick up
really soon. And I was so
pleased with just how it looks there, not having that awful thing there
anymore. And I was thinking
while I was doing it, “Yes, I need to do this more often.
I need to work more frequently in the yard.
And that will make our yard look more presentable, more lovely.
Maybe Lois and I will become such great yard people that we will
soon have a yard that’s as beautiful as the beautiful yards we’ve
seen in the communities we’ve been in.
All I just need to do is to put more afternoons into it like this
one.”
But that reminded me of similar September afternoons with a clear
blue sky and cool breeze in the air; afternoons when the weather was
nice enough to entice me away from my books and my other pursuits; away
from college football games; entice me outdoors to doing jobs.
That happens to me maybe twice a year; and that’s all, and
that’s all it’s ever been. I’ve
had September moments like that in
Texas
, in
Illinois
, in
Oklahoma
, all through the years of my
life there have been times when I’ve had these thoughts racing through
my mind about how I can clean up my yard.
And you’re laughter indicates you understand the silliness, the
futility of that process.
It’s the same with my efforts to clean up my life.
I resolved to be good, to be tolerant, to be patient, to be
pleasant in my temperament, to be generous, to be thoughtful and
considerate, and to be well-organized.
All of those things that go into a life of holiness; holiness
doesn’t even require well-organized living.
I resolved to put all of those things into my life and it lasts
about as long as I last in an unstressed state.
Let something come up in my life: a phone call that tells me I
need to go do something, and instantly I’ve got not necessarily evil
thoughts going in my mind, but certainly a confused babble of thoughts
going through my mind; carrying me off in many different directions; and
I’ve forgotten my desire to establish within myself a core throne of
peace that will permeate all my actions.
I forget that because I get focused on something that I should be
doing. The busyness of life,
takes me away from all my resolves to feel good; but it can be other
things besides busyness.
Sometimes these resolves to be holy, to be good Christians, to
have good prayer lives, all those sorts of things.
Sometimes they last as long as we are actually feeling physically
good. And when something
happens that gives us physical pain or discomfort, when we feel a little
bit sick, when a strong headache settles in, all those resolves
dissipate so quickly. It’s
so much, in my moral life, in my spiritual life; it’s so much like my
yard work life. And I
think, although you might be much better at yard work than I am, 96
or-7% of the world’s population is, so you may be much better at yard
work than I am, you still probably have an area of your life where you
can make the same illustration. You
want to be a more admirable person; not from a base motive, but from a
good motive. You’d like to
genuinely be a more saintly person, a better person, a person whose life
is what it should be. And
yet, you run into obstacles every time you try to put this plan into
action. I hope that’s an
experience many of us have had, because if not, I’m in really sorry
shape.
However, the truth about our lives is not that we can pay a ten
million dollar debt. The
truth about our lives is that we can be forgiven. All those times when
our plans go awry, all those times when we don’t even get as far as
making plans, all those times when we fail before we’ve even started,
all those times when we hurt other people or hurt ourselves in our
thoughts and words and deeds. We
can bring all these to the great Master of our lives and have them be
forgiven by simply letting God know that we’re sorry.
This is not the way we mean it to be, but this is the way it is.
We are helpless to do anything about the fact that this is a part
of who we are; please God, please God. That is the
truth-telling that God responds to; not the self-images that we build up
of how good we are. Those self-images that we wish to be a part of
people’s perception of us.
We’re certainly not going
to fool God into thinking that we’re the most brilliant, likable,
kind, generous, accomplished people in the world.
But what God does is love us anyway.
And what we need to learn to do is to live in that love anyway.
To live in that love and like it; it’s not the same as being
admired, it’s better, because it’s true. All
of our desire to be admired is ultimately based on either lies or
wishful thinking. This on
the other hand, this offer of forgiveness, this standing offer,
repeatable as many times as we need it, which is many, many times; that
offer is the truth. And
it’s there for us, that’s the difference.
We need to learn to like it because it’s the only real blessing
we could possibly receive; because of our weakness, because of what
happens when we get distracted and busy, because of the way our lives
fall apart when we’re trying to achieve goodness on our own.
So the servant who was forgiven a great debt missed the
opportunity for a really great life; a life that was lived in the truth,
a life in which he is genuinely loved by the one who genuinely loves us
more deeply and more thoroughly than any one else possibly can.
But if we allow that one to love us, then all the other loves
that we really desire and really need; those will also fall into place.
Amen.
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